And So Today I...

I feel very different today. I am in New Jersey at the Teach for America induction trainings and all I can think about is how differently I feel today. There are 49 people here with me; only three of them look like me. After leaving Spelman College in Atlanta, it is hard to convert back to being the minority... being under-represented. But that is not the focus.

I am meeting people with the traditional "Hello, my name is ... and you are..." and nothing is sticking. I do not have my car so I cannot really get to South Jersey to apartment shop and I still feel different.

Heard a beautiful poem today by Mariam Wright Elderman and I was inspired. I take the responsibility for the children who... the poem said. And with each line, I knew that those were the same children I would endlessly assume the responsibility for... and yet I feel different today... a little different from how I felt yesturday and a whole lot differently from how I felt a week ago.

I am not complaining because each new experience brings a lesson, but I am flustered because I feel different and yet I still have not been able to identify exactly how I feel!!!!!!!!!