Too Often To Be Considered a Coincidence
The day was Sunday, February 5, 2006 and I was doing something I rarely do... engaging in extended phone conversations. And for a rookie, I was doing it well if I could say so myself.
" So, what's up Buddy? How's things going for you?"
Me: Um... things are going. You know, it's life and I am just trying to live it. But like most things, my life is tough right now, but I won't complain.
" What's wrong? Tell me about it."
Me: (sigh... or should I say an extended exhale) Nothing's necessarily wrong; it's just not like I thought it would be. Let's just say that I am in a current state of trying to find myself... whatever that means!
"Find yourself huh! Most people say that, but what does this mean to you?"
Me: To me, it means locating a space within self where I feel comfortable and content with who I am. It means locating a point in life where peace come naturally and visions become reality. Finding myself means closely evaluating myself and my surroundings... strengthening all relationships worth keeping and removing those that may or may not be damaging. It means loving myself for who I am without doubt or hesitation. Finding myself means defining my purpose in life or at least my purpose for right now. It means believing that I am important and worth the world... and might I add deserving of others viewing my radiance... declaring that for a moment in time, I am the center of the universe. But simply stated, it means getting to know myself and beginning to understand the changes that my life have taken.
"O.K. Walt Whitman/ Maya Angelou... I just asked you a simple question!"
Me: That's just it, nothing's really simple anymore. In life, with growth, I have come to understand that there are no simple answers... just endless possibilities. (Yet another epiphany... this is happening way too often now to be considered common coincidences)
"Yeah, so, how's the weather up there..."
Release...
For a long time, I considered myself a free spirit. But in reality, what does this mean. Because I am not the stereotypical presentation of a free spirit: no, I don't have inscents burning and no I am now a visual artist. No, I am not a sexual explorer or a religious fanatic. Most certainly, I do set limitations to my actions and yet I do not like confinement. So howexactly am I a free spirit and just what does this involve???
.................................... I guess I'll have to wait for another random phone conversation or another moment of solitude engulfed by contemplation.
" So, what's up Buddy? How's things going for you?"
Me: Um... things are going. You know, it's life and I am just trying to live it. But like most things, my life is tough right now, but I won't complain.
" What's wrong? Tell me about it."
Me: (sigh... or should I say an extended exhale) Nothing's necessarily wrong; it's just not like I thought it would be. Let's just say that I am in a current state of trying to find myself... whatever that means!
"Find yourself huh! Most people say that, but what does this mean to you?"
Me: To me, it means locating a space within self where I feel comfortable and content with who I am. It means locating a point in life where peace come naturally and visions become reality. Finding myself means closely evaluating myself and my surroundings... strengthening all relationships worth keeping and removing those that may or may not be damaging. It means loving myself for who I am without doubt or hesitation. Finding myself means defining my purpose in life or at least my purpose for right now. It means believing that I am important and worth the world... and might I add deserving of others viewing my radiance... declaring that for a moment in time, I am the center of the universe. But simply stated, it means getting to know myself and beginning to understand the changes that my life have taken.
"O.K. Walt Whitman/ Maya Angelou... I just asked you a simple question!"
Me: That's just it, nothing's really simple anymore. In life, with growth, I have come to understand that there are no simple answers... just endless possibilities. (Yet another epiphany... this is happening way too often now to be considered common coincidences)
"Yeah, so, how's the weather up there..."
Release...
For a long time, I considered myself a free spirit. But in reality, what does this mean. Because I am not the stereotypical presentation of a free spirit: no, I don't have inscents burning and no I am now a visual artist. No, I am not a sexual explorer or a religious fanatic. Most certainly, I do set limitations to my actions and yet I do not like confinement. So howexactly am I a free spirit and just what does this involve???
.................................... I guess I'll have to wait for another random phone conversation or another moment of solitude engulfed by contemplation.
posted by Alleviation at 5:15 PM
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